Caleb was a Demon Worshiper, then used a mix of Paganism, Wicca and Witchcraft.
(Also, for Caleb’s article on what he did on Halloween as an Occultist, and his very different views on Halloween now, please see this link.)
Having known Caleb for a few years, I was so delighted when he agreed to writing his testimony for this blog. This is the very first time Caleb has shared on the internet. So, I am very excited he has taken this bold step.
Below, he describes just some of his experiences with the supernatural, that spanned from the age of 14-26 years.
Caleb’s Early Days In The Occult.
Caleb explained to me, “I considered myself a Solider of Satan,’ under the guise of darkness. It was all to kill, steal and destroy,”
John 10:10 The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.
I won’t go into a lot of detail. It’s enough just to give a glimpse into the evil world that I got into. When into demon worship, I had a ram’s head on a pentagram and spoke, chanted, etc, with it. I wrote a lot of poems and spells then. When I wrote songs, poems, etc, it was not coming from me, as it just flowed. Things got revealed to me.
I had an altar with 3 statues. On one I’d put my nail clippings in the bowl and round the figurines I’d have the hair and nails of who ever I had cursed.
I’d scan through books such as Raymond Buckland and some Egyptian magick books, to name but a few.
My worship was very grass roots. Even other witches wouldn’t accept me at first, as I never dressed the Gothic style they did. I was more Crowley/Gardner than Sanders. Much of it was all for show. All my life I looked up to the stars and got drawn to Orion’s Belt and the full moon.
Halloween definately had a pull on me, for me when I moved from Demon worship to become a pagan. I meditated on ‘the dead’, on the night of Samhain, to mark the pagan new year. I did feel a stronger supernatural connection at Halloween.
I’d go out and take part in the festivities and have my own time round the park, I did feel stronger than at other times of the year.
Around Halloween, I also feel stronger using Tarot Cards, than usual. I never learned them, but could just read them and it’d be correct for the person getting read. As a demon worshiper, I was fond of drinking blood in a sexual context. My altar, when demon worshiping, resembled a witch altar.
At that time, at the start, I was unaware about any books, or like-minded people,etc. I just went into a world of my own for 3/4 years. For me Halloween was everyday! Looking back, I can see when things got a grip of me. My mother became a christian when I was 9 and after going along to church with her I didn’t feel right then and believe it or not, it was on Halloween!
Turning Fully From Christian Church.
So, I made my mind up not to go back to church, because it was Halloween, so my brother dressed me as a ‘liqorice all sport’ and that night the anxiety and the ‘all eyes are on me’ feeling in the church put a stop to it.
Three years later I went to a Ninpo (Ninja) class and at the start they would pray to Buddha.
Then a few years later I came across the skull of a goat/ram in my friend’s house his mother was a good Catholic by day, and a practising witch at night!
Before too long I was writing spells, poetry, songs and it was common for the words to just flow. My hearing amplified. I could tell what people were thinking and could give them readings. I invited them to use me, then it came to a point when I felt a voice (not audible), saying, ‘You’ve had a taste, now its time to basically sign on the dotted line.’
Deeper Into Darkness.
I stopped that day. I made a noose and hung the skull from my curtain pole in my room, looking out a window, with a poster sized Pentagram on it.
After 2 years I got interested in Witch craft and over a year went from white (as I thought ) to gray, then black Witch craft. It was a mix of demon worship and a shrouded Wiccan style.
I was given three statues and I used to place my finger and toe nail clippings in the bowl at the top and all cursed nails and hair from others, and bits of photos all around it. It was given to me, all cobwebbed, with dead flies on it.
Invitation To Occult Orgies.
I was invited to a few gatherings. But for every friend of the guy that invited me, there was someone younger and there were connotations of homosexuality.
They asked me if I’ve tried it! I said, ‘No, not my thing.’ But the words, ‘Don’t knock it till you try it,’ was his reply!
So after that and going along to one of their nights, I felt they did it just to get an orgy. I got invited once more but declined.
Six months after that, I ended up in prison for 3 and a half years. I actually felt good when given my jail number 666 18. I felt it was no coincidence! Then after Admin’ Hall, I spent 13 months in ‘D Hall’, cell 13, right next to the old ‘hanging cell’, where the executioner would hang people sentenced to death.
I liked the fact it was cell 13, a magick number I thought! I think the last occupant had been a Pagan, because when I walked in, a picture of Stonehenge made me feel at home.
On the 17 January, 9 years ago, I was in a state of unknown drug withdrawal, as my years of selling drugs had took its toll on me. I lost my phone so I couldn’t get some contacts (drug). I had been consuming 20 to 30 Valium daily, along with any pill that I could take. (Valium or ‘Diazepam’, is a Benzodiazepine prescription drug).
Then 10 days later, I was getting attacked to the point a child would say hello and I’d get anxious and jumpy. The ‘fear of man,’ and everything else was strong.
I asked my mother for the first time to pray for me. She said I’ve been praying for you for 17 years, pray for yourself. So I went in my room and for the first time said, if there is a God (of the Bible) please help, as the gods I’d been worshiping weren’t helping.
Torment and Desperation.
Next day I smoked copious amount of heroin but it didn’t help, as I was withdrawing from a cocktail of drugs. The next day I couldn’t get any. The area I live in is infamous for drugs and I was seasoned in that lifestyle – more on the dealing side. Nowhere could I get it. Then on the Thursday night the torment was the worst I’ve ever had.
I went to my mum. I said, ‘I’ve got a fear like no other, it was different – manic 100 miles an hour, can’t shake thoughts’. She said ‘The opposite of fear is faith’. I said ‘Don’t hit me with that Jesus cr*p’. As I’d thrown craft books on her Bible, etc, in the past. But something inside – an inner cry said, ‘But I need this.’
My Mother’s Prayers.
The next hour was hazy. She phoned her friend. I think I made a cry to Christ. (Aunty Caroline, mighty woman of God, came to my mum’s, in what seemed 5 minutes. She lived 8 miles away). My mum and Caroline prayed over me. I repeated the sinners prayer.
My Prayer For Salvation.
When I stood up for a glimpse, I felt 10 foot tall. I looked down on each side of me and seen my mum and Caroline as wee bowling balls. I felt free and light.
The next 4 weeks found me watching almost 24 hours a day, channels like Revelation tv, God channel, etc. Every time it got turned off the channels, I got what I know now is ‘attacks’.
When I came to Jesus, the minute I gave my heart to Him, I felt 12 foot tall! I felt a new person. I grasped that it was a new beginning. I went down to Wales, where I got a good bit of Christian teaching. Also, at this time, I was aware that Jesus was always there with me.
Over the years, I’d hone my defence against attacks, as it was a regular thing in my walk back then. A lot did happen at that time that only God could have done.
A famous man once said something like, “I am convinced if God played dice, He’d win every time.’
From Demon Worship To Worshiping Jesus Christ.
Within 3 months I was writing sermons and asking questions that nobody could answer. So I said I should just give this up, as no-one could answer my questions.
But based on the night I got saved and became blood bought I knew I owed it to Christ and myself to press in.
I couldn’t deny what happened and especially having come from a path where supernatural things happened frequently.
My Christian Walk.
I’ve had my battles, through various stressful things happening all at once. Firstly, my fiancee and I losing our first born son. (I’ve always wondered if it was linked to the demon worship); having our second beautiful child, then moving house three times, getting married, then my beloved wife going through Chemo’. And the passing of my father, due to alcohol abuse.
It was a stressful time, as all of this happened over a three year period.
But I’ve never turned from God. I had a few attacks with drugs but short lived, praise God. Proverbs 24-16
My walk hasn’t been easy but I’ve kept pressing in, trying to take the narrow path.
It’s been lonely, as a lot of Christians feel threatened by me. Also, I’m tall, at 6 foot 4. But look at what I once was!
When sharing my testimony, I’ve seen a difference in Christians, when they find out about my Occult past!
Over time, I built that closer relationship with Jesus, to where I now feel He is walking closely next to me.
I read my Bible almost daily. Over 9 years now, since my conversion, and it continues to renew my mind. Especially, when I have fallen, it’s amazing how quickly certain things return to the old you, BUT God is just and good to forgive my sins, 1 John 1-9.
I continue to share my faith, sometimes on a daily basis, in places like coffee shops, McDonald’s, etc. When I open my bible it draws people to come over and talk.
The first scripture the Lord ever gave me was Matthew 11 : 30 ‘For My yoke is easy and My burden is light’. It spoke to my conversion experience and He also gave me Proverbs 18-7.
My Advice To New Agers Or Occultists.
Please take it from someone who has seen the dark side and been open to demonic influence, it always ends in broken-ness, physically, spiritually and in your relationships.
To anyone who is caught up and tormented, call on the Name of Jesus Christ – the Jesus of the Bible. And ask Him for total deliverance from your captors.
Advice For Christians Speaking To Others.
The best way to witness to family and friends involved in the New Age or Occult, etc, is to firstly, just meet them where they’re at! Then introduce Jesus, once the ground work is done.
If they are tormented, as I was, the name of Jesus is All powerful. Pray for discernment when reaching out to them.
Thank you for reading my testimony and I give God all the glory and honour, for all He is, and for what He has done in my life.”
Many thanks, Laura Maxwell
DISCLAIMER: Caleb Keogh is not related in any way to Caleb Dyer, nor Krystal the Pagan Wiccan or others featured in the True Crime TV show, Obsession: Dark Desires.